My Grandfather Was With Me

I've been struggling since Thursday; triggering, a lot.  There have been two main contributors, well, three actually.

1. I'm on my period.  Stupid hormones.
2. A recent explosion of a pocket of emotions I didn't realize were buried.  It's good that they are coming to the surface so I can deal with them, but they are still painful, and they still cause me to want to numb.
3. The adversary.  Jerk.

Last night my struggles reached an unbearable level.  So much so that I knew I just needed to get to bed safe.  I crashed down on my knees before bed and begged Heavenly Father to comfort me, bless me and help me stay safe.  I specifically asked Him to allow angels to attend me; even a specific angel.  My great great great grandfather to whom I feel especially close.

I prayed:

Dear Heavenly Father, please help me stay safe.  Please allow my great great great grandfather to be with me.  I need him.  I need to feel his presence.  Please allow him to touch me; not that I can feel his touch, but I really want him to be close to me; to touch me.  Please let him protect me as I sleep.

I stood, crawled into bed and snuggled under the covers. 

I immediately began to fall into a sweet and peaceful slumber when I was startled awake by intense waves of goosebumps rolling all over my body, from my head to my toes.

I laid there. 

Still.

Drinking the sensation.  

And I knew, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that Heavenly Father had answered my prayer.

My grandfather was with me.